When I ask people about their family life growing up, most say “it was good.”
We often don’t classify our life growing up as chaotic because we don’t know any different. We assume what we experienced was normal.
But, we do experience the consequences.
Every family has some dysfunction - some have more than others. These are some of the characteristics of dysfunctional families.
Think back to your childhood. How would you describe it?
Was is chaotic or stable?
Did you feel safe or afraid?
Was it reliable or unreliable?
Most of our adult behaviors can be traced back to childhood. If you grew up in a dysfunctionl home, you may notice it has impacted several key areas of your adult life.
Dysfunctional homes usually have these qualities:
caregivers say one thing and do another
little to no empathy or understanding when someone makes a mistake or falls short
very little communication about family issues or emotions
a culture of pretending everything is fine even when it isn't
caregiver addiction or substance use that impacts parenting and other family relationships
caregivers are unreliable
caregivers are controlling
nothing you do is good enough and there is an extreme culture of perfectionism
high level of criticism of your abilities
little to no independence or privacy
no emotional support
physical and/or emotional abuse or violence
If you grew up in a home with excessive amounts of chaos and dysfunction, you may experience
Low self esteem
Trouble forming healthy adult relationships
High levels of frustration or anger
Trouble focusing
Addiction
This isn’t about blaming your family. When we look at the system that we grew up in, we can better understand the symptoms that we are experiencing now. We can also choose how we want our families to look and functions as adults.
In this webinar, I will cover:
what leads to dysfunction in families
how family dysfunction impacts us as adults
how to start healing these wounds
how to make sure you don't repeat the pattern